This Wasn’t On My Birth Plan

I had a birth plan. A beautifully well written, photo copied (to give to every nurse), extraordinary birth plan. As soon as I entered the hospital it was the first thing I showed every person that came near me. “This is my birth plan” “Please read it”. Labor started and it was the most uncomfortable feeling in the universe. I will not get into too many details because I do not want to scare you from having a child. This is not my intention. Everyone is different and every birth is different. So just think rainbows and unicorns. God help you. Long story short, I was rushed to an emergency c-section the baby’s heart was dropping and I went into shock. My baby was born with the umbilical chord wrapped around his neck once and feet twice. Talk about scary. This was the scariest most surreal moment I have ever lived through. You see emergencies on the television, but you never really believe you can live through one. Due to such a harsh labor and delivery our son was born with a few complications. He had a lung collapse, pressure on the right side of his heart and to make matters worse our blood type was incompatible. My antibodies were attacking his red blood cells and he became severe jaundiced. All I could think about is this was not in the birth┬áplan. I was supposed to have an ok birth (I am a realist I knew it wouldn’t be pain free), but after all of that I was supposed to hold my baby and get to do skin to skin contact, along with breast feeding and latching. I was supposed to share a room with my little one and have the hospital photographer come and take these amazing pictures of us. My story was not that way at all and I found myself in excruciating recovery pain, my legs and feet were so swollen they looked painful imagine what they felt like. All you could see was me; a sleep deprived, crying my eyes out, swollen legs and feet terrible looking thing of a woman hobbling over to the NICU of the hospital and looking at my baby without being able to hold him or feed him because he had to be treated. It was the most painful eleven days of my life and this was just the beginning. So here I am a new mom with a new baby boy and nothing is the way it was supposed to be. The only thing I knew was that I was not going to leave his side. I would be there all day from the morning rounds with the doctors to the rotation of the┬ánurses. It was an ordeal in itself and all I could do was cry and pray. And to top it off when I would go back to my room to eat I would see the visitors visiting the new moms and their newborns. I would see the photographer going to the rooms to take the amazing pictures of these new moms and their babies. I was in a very sad state, but my story has an incredible ending… Landon became stronger every single day and he became healthier and conquered all his ailments. The only thing left to conquer was to have his heart checked at his four month mark to check if it had completely healed as well. I am glad and grateful to say that YES at our four month cardiologist visit she confirmed that Landon was completely recovered. He was a healthy baby boy. Over 49.5 hours of excruciating labor along with over 216 hours of Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, and another 3 1/2 months of worrying whether his heart was going to be ok and now finally I have a healthy baby boy. I could care less about the photographer or how amazing things were supposed to be because God gave me a healthy baby boy! So when you are writing your most beautiful birth plan and print it out and make the copies just know that not everything will happen that way and there is a chance nothing on it will be followed. And be ok with that because at the end the health of you and your baby is what is the most important. I will now try to give this little guy the best life he can have. I will always give him my best and my all. So our story has begun and this blog will be all about our journey together. From breastfeeding to toys and all of the in between. Thank you for following our story and if you like what you see … SUBSCRIBE <3.

 

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